"Loving Thy Neighbour" by Saint Catherine of Siena

Dear Diary,

Continuing my read on the book “Why the Mystic Matter Now” by Frederick Bauerschmidt… I came across yet another amazing story, this time of Catherine of Siena. I will attempt to summarise as before. Catherine was the 23rd child of 24 children born to a well-to-do cloth dyer and his wife. She made a secret vow of virginity when she was young and eventually received habit of mantellate (Dominican order). Rather than doing the typical work of the mantellate, Catherine spent the next 3 years in isolation in her room, learning to read and practising severe penances (eg. extreme fasting, self-flagellation, keeping strict silence etc). The only time she left her room was to go to Mass each day. She has this intense visionary experience known as the “mystical espousal”.

After that experience she started engaging in charity work similar to the modern day works of Mother Theresa of Calcutta in tending the poor, the sick and the dying. In 1370, she underwent a 4-hour “mystical death” which she claimed that she had in fact been dead, and seen heaven, hell and purgatory (hmmm…). She subsequently got involved in church politics, calling for the Pope to leave Avignon, Southern France (where the papacy resided under the thumb of the king of France) and return to Rome.

Catherine recognised that love normally involves a relationship of reciprocity; when someone loves us we desire to return that love. Yet if it is true that God creates out of “immense generosity” and not out of any need, what can I possibly give God in response? God’s gift to us of our existence is entirely free, entirely beyond anything we could demand, ask, imagine or repay… in fact, God loves us prior to our existence… geeshhh… So Catherine said that anything we give to God is simply what is owed to God already, since everything we have and possess comes from God to begin with (Yup, the same confession we made as Anglicans when we pray the offertory prayer from the Book of Common Prayers). Hence, we can never love God with the freedom and generosity that God loves us with because we, in loving God, are always motivated by the love that God has already given us.

In “the Dialogue”, God apparently said to Catherine:

I ask you to love me with the same love with which I love you. But for me you cannot do this, for I loved you without being loved. Whatever love you have for me you owe me, so you love me not gratuitously but out of duty, while I love you not out of duty but gratuitously. So you cannot give me the kind of love I ask of you. This is why I have put you among your neighbours so that you can do for them what you cannot do for me – that is, love them without any concern for thanks and without looking for any profit for yourself. And whatever you do for them I will consider done for me.

For a moment I thought… geez… isn’t this just so similar to what I read in the gospel according to St. Matthew, Chapter 25, verses 35 – 40? Love your neighbour solves the problem of reciprocity between divine and human love. We can love as God loves … that is, with nothing to gain from that loving… when we exercise that harsh and dreadful love for our neighbours who do not respond to or recognise our love. It is precisely in these acts of love that go unreciprocated that we most closely imitate God’s way of loving (Luke 6:32 – 36).

I remember this famous verse,

“We love because he first loved us. If anyone says, ‘I love God’, yet hates his brother, he is a liar. For anyone who does not love his brother whom he has seen, cannot love God, whom he has not seen. And he has given us this command: Whoever loves God must also love his brother” (1 John 4:19 – 21).

How true! Thankfully, I haven’t really hated anyone so far... or rather, at this point in time, haha... At least, we can take comfort that we will not be tempted or tested more than we can bear! (1 Corinthians 10:13) Yay… better pray the Lord’s Prayer more often, especially “Lead me not into temptation…” Haha… Anyway, Catherine was canonised in 1461 and venerated as a saint in the Roman Catholic and Lutheran churches.

I guess I am more resolved now to try my best by God’s grace and strength to love the people around me. To love without expecting response or reward… hmmm… but admittedly, it would be good if there is! ;-) Okay, surely you know I am not up to mark yet. Just yet! I will try and persevere! Haha…

Oh yes, there are some emotionally-charged office issues (including some “confrontational” meeting) coming up… Must be firm and yet loving… and smiling… awww… how hard! Haha… think Saint Catherine of Siena.

That’s all for now… take care and have a good night! =)

God Bless,

Andrew